After kicking myself for blowing up the PI  and wallowing in self-pity, I did a little research, eventually running across the Raspberry PICO. Cheap, small... it's perfect for this application. It also actually revealed to me that the Raspberry PI was way overkill for this anyway!

That, or maybe I'm just trying to justify trashing my PI? 

No, it's not that since my verty thoughtful son-in-law Justin bought it for me a a gift. 

Yeah, now I feel like sh*t.