Benchoffisms

Details

"""You're going to a carnival, and there's this tent with bizarre 
side show attractions. *do you go in?* Of course you do. 
Because there's weird shit behind that curtain."""

- Does context really matter here?

"Stop breaking shit"

- Benchoff to @alpha_ninja when he broke the Hacker Channel for the Nth time with a picture of cats.

"Um, you probably shouldn't do that"

- Benchoff after asking the Hacker Channel if it was possible to access a secret link. It turns out it wasn't so secret.

"We have a damn website. It's this website."

- Benchoff's reply to a request for a website for the Travelling Hacker Box.

"Except it’s not an android. Androids are designed to pass as humans. This is simply a humanoid robot, and the author of this article should be ashamed. I expected more out of Hackaday and Benchoff is a complete idiot. Rabble rabble I don’t have to put up with this clickbait"

- Benchoff goes third person.

"Engineers can follow instructions. I have given you instructions. Ergo…"
"I seriously don’t know what to say. I repeat the same thing, every single week."
"I honestly give up. I can’t explain this any more."

- Benchoff's sanity balances along a knife edge during the Hackaday Prize community voting.

"if Windows.version.beginswith("9")
     return Windows.98"

- Benchoff on why they couldn't name it Windows 9, "because there's some dumbass code out there".

"I'm not here to entertain you"

- Benchoff2015

"Popcorn came before wifi."

- Benchoff on why the 2.4GHz band is now an ISM band.

"People liked it. It had to go."

- Benchoff tells us why he changes things.

"[Editors] sell eyeballs."

- Benchoff only does eyes, ju-, ju-, just eyes.

"I'm just saying, if you have coworkers, don't get blues"

- Benchoff out of context.

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

- Benchoff yelling at the stage when he is complimented for his crucial coffee production work at the Superconference (cheers

@zakqwy).

"So who watched Doctor Who tonight and is now typing fan fiction with one hand?"

- Benchoff uses his write hand.

"God damn our comments suck."

- Benchoff on hackaday.com. comments.

"what the god damn shit is this fuck"

- Benchoff checks out http://www.searlsolution.com/

"yes, yes, let's all congratulate me for thinking someone should do something"

- Benchoff accepts his award.

"Yes, I'm expensing smoke bombs"

- Benchoff's expense report.

"April Fool’s Day was last Friday, and the Internet was garbage for a day."

- Benchoff was not fooled.

"don't talk shit about the model M"

- Benchoff's precious.

Project Logs

Collapse

Build Instructions

Collapse

Step 1

Be Benchoff.

Step 2

Go to step 1.

Discussions

Yann Guidon / YGDES wrote 04/22/2017 at 14:57

https://9gag.com/gag/aPB1zVP

Are you sure? yes | no

Yann Guidon / YGDES wrote 04/22/2017 at 14:57

Are you sure? yes | no

Blecky wrote 07/24/2017 at 16:00

OH MY GOD!

Are you sure? yes | no

oshpark wrote 03/22/2017 at 07:34

@Benchoff now in coin form! "Creating the Benchoff Nickel" by Andrew Sowa http://andrewsowa.com/blog/2017/3/19/creating-the-benchoff-nickel

Are you sure? yes | no

Blecky wrote 04/21/2017 at 04:34

Wow! OSH Park can get that much texturing on a PCB?

Are you sure? yes | no

oshpark wrote 04/22/2017 at 05:57

Yeah, Andrew Sowa was able to construct a 5 color palette. The 2 layer FR4 seems to work best. Our 4 layer is FR408 which is white. As the silkscreen is already white, it ends up essentially being a 4 color palette.

Are you sure? yes | no

Aleksandar Bradic wrote 09/14/2016 at 18:51

Hey - we're starting to work on the 2016 Hackaday Omnibus, could use some more Benchoffisms :P

Are you sure? yes | no

Yann Guidon / YGDES wrote 09/15/2016 at 02:34

People here only collect. Only Benchoff can benchoff so he's the one to inquire :-)

Are you sure? yes | no

alpha_ninja wrote 04/26/2016 at 17:20

new badge! :o

Are you sure? yes | no

Eric Hertz wrote 03/31/2016 at 12:31

Hah, just stumbled across a few decent #Benchoffisms over at http://hackaday.com/2014/03/05/hackaday-68k-blinking-a-led/

... something about measuring time in DS9-episodes!

Are you sure? yes | no

alpha_ninja wrote 12/07/2015 at 06:32

new profile pic https://cdn.hackaday.io/ images/resize/600x600/509151449467446088.png

Are you sure? yes | no

Blecky wrote 12/07/2015 at 06:47

I'm noticing a trend:

Are you sure? yes | no

alpha_ninja wrote 12/07/2015 at 07:07

Are you sure? yes | no

Yann Guidon / YGDES wrote 12/07/2015 at 07:12

hairy...

Are you sure? yes | no

K.C. Lee wrote 12/06/2015 at 03:18

Need to make a calendar with all the collected (shown as an example of what it would look like)

Are you sure? yes | no

Alex Rich wrote 12/04/2015 at 23:21

Can't believe the "THERES KOREAN BBQ IN NYC??" question posed to LadyaAda during hackchat has not been included

Are you sure? yes | no

Blecky wrote 12/06/2015 at 00:41

All in good time ;)

Are you sure? yes | no

zakqwy wrote 11/18/2015 at 13:43

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" - @Benchoff yelling at the stage when he is complimented for his crucial coffee production work at the Superconference

Are you sure? yes | no

Benchoff wrote 11/18/2015 at 17:07

I Boo'ed whenever I was mentioned.

IN OTHER NEWS, making coffee was insane. Giant, 4 gallon percolators on a 110 supply. Do you know how long it takes to heat up four gallons of water? I'm changing those coffee makers to 220.

Are you sure? yes | no

Kumar, Abhishek wrote 11/18/2015 at 05:15

@Yann Guidon / YGDES sure, but (i) You'd have to remain online all the time, (ii) It's #Bleckyness, not #Bleckyisms ;)

Are you sure? yes | no

Yann Guidon / YGDES wrote 11/18/2015 at 05:17

Nobody is perfect (and I'm not nobody)

Are you sure? yes | no

Yann Guidon / YGDES wrote 11/18/2015 at 02:45

How can Bleky be sure that this list is comprehensive ?

Are you sure? yes | no

Blecky wrote 11/18/2015 at 03:01

Blecky sees all!

Are you sure? yes | no

Yann Guidon / YGDES wrote 11/18/2015 at 03:06

Hmmm maybe it's time to start the #Bleckyisms project ? :-P

Are you sure? yes | no

Eric Hertz wrote 11/16/2015 at 14:13

I think you need a "best-out-of-context" section... Scrolling backwards through the logs, this one-liner is fun: "I'm just saying, if you have coworkers, don't get blues"

Are you sure? yes | no

alpha_ninja wrote 11/13/2015 at 14:22

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

Are you sure? yes | no

davedarko wrote 11/13/2015 at 14:32

PK¯2mGblah.txtUXìñEVêñEVõÊQ

€ À«¼¿ºA'ð[.¸dúéö‰ß3a¹ñ¢yUô$ÄWÑâ†Ã‰0x’ÝråÒYdlË
D=íMZÁd
ûúPK÷}ITPK¯2mG÷}IT@¤blah.txtUXìñEVêñEVPKB

Are you sure? yes | no

danjovic wrote 11/13/2015 at 14:45

starts with PK? Is it a ZIP file?

Are you sure? yes | no

alpha_ninja wrote 11/13/2015 at 16:13

well that backfired. :P

Are you sure? yes | no

davedarko wrote 01/21/2016 at 10:58

not sure why I didn't do this before, here is the content of blah.txt: I'm not sure what you did, but I'm sure it will take you a while to decipher this ;)

UPSI. Danjovic. The man. I took 'Hex Fiend' and saved the hex to a zip file.

Are you sure? yes | no

danjovic wrote 11/13/2015 at 14:56

I'm not sure what you did, but I'm sure it will take you a while to decipher this ;)

Used Notepad++ and python

Now try to crack that. You may not break it with a X86, but surely will do with a Z80

3f 3d 24 1d 00 37 3a 31 2a 38

Are you sure? yes | no

Blecky wrote 11/17/2015 at 04:10

Oh haha, that's what alpha_ninja had in their ninja zip file.

I'll give you all a hint (that alpha_ninja observed), the original values were ASCII chars and there is a reason why the above is all even hex values.

Are you sure? yes | no

Eric Hertz wrote 11/13/2015 at 08:53

wtf, that ain't ascii....

Are you sure? yes | no

Blecky wrote 11/13/2015 at 08:54

Nope ;)

Are you sure? yes | no

Eric Hertz wrote 11/13/2015 at 08:57

well, crap... is it a Benchoffism, or a description of one?

Are you sure? yes | no

Blecky wrote 11/13/2015 at 09:01

Its an unfulfilling Easter egg.

Are you sure? yes | no

Aleksandar Bradic wrote 10/16/2015 at 04:44

hey Blecky - I am planning on including these into the 2015 Hackaday Omnibus as "motivational posters" :) - example:
Hope that's OK! I'll make sure to credit you ;)

Are you sure? yes | no

Blecky wrote 10/16/2015 at 04:52

Perfectly fine :D

The more Benchoffness, the better!

Are you sure? yes | no

alpha_ninja wrote 10/12/2015 at 02:37

New quote: "Popcorn came before wifi."

Are you sure? yes | no

zakqwy wrote 10/08/2015 at 15:40

omg thank you for this

Are you sure? yes | no

Richard Hogben wrote 10/08/2015 at 13:38

SHOW ME WHAT YOU GOT

Are you sure? yes | no

Radu Motisan wrote 10/08/2015 at 09:29

haha Blecky, this is funny .

Are you sure? yes | no

Benchoffisms

Description

Details

Components

Project Logs

Collapse

Read at your own risk.

Benchoff Album Out Soon!

Respect the ladies, or get the fuck out.

gardening tragedies that make you go WTF

Badgeoffism

Step 1

Enjoy a Panelized DickButt

I just want to point something out.

Get Your Own Benchoff Nickel!

"Someone has poor judgement and made me an admin."

Build Instructions

Collapse

Discussions

Similar Projects

Alpha Groot

How to Get a Lovely Pikachu

Tear Downs

Bite My Shiny Metal Trash

Benchoffisms

Become a Hackaday.io member

Just one more thing

Description

Details

Components

Project Logs Collapse

Build Instructions Collapse

Enjoy this project?

Discussions

Become a Hackaday.io Member

Similar Projects

Does this project spark your interest?

Report project as inappropriate

Send message

Remove Member

Project Logs

Collapse

Build Instructions

Collapse